Understanding Parenting Styles

Impact of parents on their child’s behavior have long been the interest of many developmental psychologists. However, finding the reason for the children changing behavior is very difficult as they tend to behave very different during their growth. Through intense research, intensive types of four parenting styles have been differentiated to identity the growth patterns of the children.

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Authoritarian parenting is one style where the children are expected to follow the strict rules and regulations made by their parents. If the children fail to follow the rules, then they would be severely punished. In this style, reasoning for rules are not clearly explained by parents and they want their children to follow their orders without any questions.

Authoritative parenting is another style, but much more similar to authoritarian style. Here, parents establish strict rules and guidelines for their children to follow. However, unlike authoritarian, these parents always tend to listen to their children questions. Also, if the children break the rules, these parents tend to be more of forgiving than punishing.

Permissive style or indulgent style parents have only few expectations from their children. These parents tend to control their children very rarely. This type of parents are very communicative and nurturing to their children.

Finally, uninvolved style parents also have very few demands and they are non-communicative and do not have any response over the children. Though these parents sometimes fulfill the needs of the children, they always tend to detach from their child’s life and never care much about them.

 

How to Discipline Teens without Disturbing the Relationship

Raising a teen is definitely a challenging task and parents have to face so many things to discipline their teenage children. Most teenage children show their anger by slamming the door, raging hormones, screaming, and arguing. Parents should follow a balance between love and authority while disciplining their children. Here are few tips to discipline the teen without disturbing the relationship.

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Parents should be very consistent with their children, especially with the teenagers. Parents changing moods might develop frustration and stress among children. It is the job of the parents to provide more information of real world and provide them direction and security.

Listening is the most important characteristics for the parents. Teens always want their opinions and words to be respected and valued and this can be done only by listening. Even if the teenagers are arguing, parents should listen before talking anything.

Parents should know to control the anger because teenagers may argue to their parents until they lose their patience. At this situation, it is better for the parents to move away from that place. Consistent parenting helps to develop open communication and also reduces confusion in the relationship.

Being friend with the teens is good, but being a parent is very important. Only parents can provide securities and boundaries for their children. Parents while commenting on the wrongdoing of the teen should be very careful and they should comment only on the behavior not the teen. Parents should allow their teen to fail because certain things in life is well understood only through failures.

 

Deciding How Much Allowance to Give a Teenager

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Providing your teenager with enough cash each week to keep them entertained without spoiling them can be a tough. Knowing how much allowance to give your son or daughter can depend on many factors, and should not only be dependent upon them fitting in with his or her friends.

Depending on how old your teenager is, and your personal views on teenagers being employed, it is good to encourage your son or daughter to get a part-time job. It doesn’t have to involve a large amount of time for him or her, maybe even just one or two afternoons a week. Earning money will teach your son or daughter to value it more than if it was just handed to them by you.

If your teenager is still too young or you don’t want them to work yet, you will need to give them an allowance of some sort. You will need to take into account factors such as the child’s age, and his or her level of social activities. Generally, the older a child is the more money he or she will need to partake in activities with friends such as movies, shopping and sporting activities. Some people give the child $1 for every year of age, although with the cost of living these days you may want to give them a few dollars more.

Make sure you take into account your family’s finances when deciding how much allowance to give your teenager. Don’t promise them anything which is above and beyond what you are able to give them and still remain financially comfortable for your own expenses.

 

Verbal Abuse

Kelly Ward has never had a good relationship with her father. He is hypercritical, belittling, and mean. Kelly endured his temper and verbal abuse, but now she has children to protect.

When the children were very young, Kelly tried to deflect her father’s criticism or make light of it. But her children constantly asked why Grandpa was so angry and worse, what had they done? She assured them that Grandpa’s temper was not their fault, but wondered if being around her father was harming them.

Kelly finally decided her children were old enough to understand that some people are abusive, and Grandpa is one of them. They discussed how unhappy he made other people, and how that made the children feel. They also talked openly about her Mom, who is a sweet woman who has chosen to stay in a verbally abusive relationship.

Kelly then spoke to her father alone and told him that he could not verbally abuse her children and if he did, she would ask him to leave. This conversation was heated and led to a family confrontation, which included Kelly’s brother and sister.  Kelly stood her ground even though it meant most of her family did not speak to her for several months. When she did see her family, she usually had to explain her position quietly and firmly.

Kelly does not force her children to be around her father. She has asked them to politely greet her parents when they come over, but the children may then leave. Kelly believes she not only protected her children but also showed them that no one deserves to be abused or needs to endure it.

Should Parents Monitior Their Child’s Online Activity?

Sometimes parents face a dilemma. Should they monitor their children’s activity online? Should they read their e-mail? Have access to their Facebook or other accounts? Should parents limit the sites that children can access online?

Some parents think that it is an invasion of their child’s privacy to do these things. Other parents disagree. There are several things to keep in mind when thinking about this issue. You want to know where your child is going, who he is talking to, and what he is doing online.

Just as you set up rules at home (such as how much time your children can spend watching TV or when their curfew is), you should set up rules about computer use. Your child should use the computer in a public area. Your child should not give out personal information such as his name, address, or telephone number to people he meets in chat rooms. He should never meet face-to-face with a person he meets online.

There are ways that you can monitor and control what your child does on the computer. You can install a software program that tracks the keystrokes on a keyboard. This helps you track if your child is searching for pornography online or participating in illegal activities. You can also set up user accounts for your children on your computer. These accounts limit what the user can do to the computer (install software, delete programs).

You can install PC Tools antivirus programs and spyware programs. This will keep your computer safe from viruses and they will keep your personal information safe from spyware.

There are software programs that limit the places that your children can go to online. Remember that you are legally responsible for your underage children. Using software tools that monitor your children’s activities and keep them safe will make your life easier and give you peace of mind.

The Bad Styles Of Parenting

There are many different parenting styles that are used by parents. Some of these parenting styles are good ones and there are other parenting styles that are bad. Parents should use the right parenting method to make sure that their children grow up to be good people. If the parenting style that is used by the parents are not good, then the children will be the ones who will be affected and they will not be disciplined at all.

The authoritarian style of parenting is one of the bad forms of parenting. In this form of parenting m the parent is like a boss to the child and likes the child to obey all the orders of the child. What happens in this kind of parenting is that the child will be like a suppressed gas in a balloon and as soon as the child gets a chance to explode, the child will do as many mistakes as possible. So, this can lead to problems and should not be the right style.

Permissive style of parenting is one in which the parents are not controlling their child. There is no disciplining the child and the parents do not care if the child is doing the right thing or the wrong thing. This is another of the wrong methods of parenting. This is because the child has a high chance of learning the wrong things from peers and this can also lead to problems for the child.

There are other parents who lead a neglecting parenting style. In this parenting style too, the parents will neglect their children completely. This too can cause a lot of problems in the children. The parents are not able to control their kids, even if they would like to control the kids. So, this kind of parenting style should be given a miss if the child needs to be good.

Helping Your Christian Student Thrive at College

As a Christian parent, you’ve worked diligently to raise wonderful children with good moral character. Regular church attendance,

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Bible study and maybe even a Christian school have formed the center of your family life. You’ve probably sheltered your children from many of the negative influences that exist in the world. Now you’re preparing to send your children off to college. Nervous? Don’t be. While it is wise to be concerned, you need to realize there are things you can do now to make certain your children are fully prepared to handle any tough choices they are forced to make.

The truth is college life can get a little wild. For many students, this is their first taste of independence and sometimes the freedom is too much. Alcohol use, drug abuse and other things are considered by some a rite of passage. Many students will spend more time partying than they do studying. Talk to your children frankly about the temptations that will most likely come their way, and they will be better prepared to handle them.

If your children are overly worried about the things they may see and experience at a traditional school, you should consider an online university. Sites such as EarnMyDegree.com are wonderful resources for exploring this option. You might be surprised by the wide variety of degrees available, and by the number of good universities that offer online degrees. By attending an online university, your children will gain greater flexibility with their schedules and have an easier time maintaining their moral compass.

Whatever type of college your child chooses, send your child off with love in your heart. Remind your children of their upbringing and their faith in God, remind them that you love them unconditionally, and let them know that even if they falter, you will be there to help them get back on track.

Parenting A Rebellious Child

There are some kids who are rebellious without reason. The truth is that there will be some reason for the rebellious nature of the child. In fact, in most cases, it is the parents who are responsible for the rebellion in their children. The parents may have been doing certain things either consciously or in an unconscious manner that will cause the children to rebel.

There are some parents who cause their children to get angry with their actions. The parents may be suppressing their child without reason. This can cause the child to have various problems. When the child is suppressed, then there is sure to be a rebellion if the child is an extroverted one. On the other hand, if the child is an introvert, then the child will become very submissive and this too is not good for the child.

There are certain methods that need to be used while parenting a rebellious child. The parents must make sure that the child gets a lot of affection. This is the first thing that the parents can do to get the child to become normal again. There are many situations where the child may not be very happy because of the restrictions that are enforced by the parents. If the parents are enforcing the same kind of restrictions with the affection and explain the reason, then the child will be able to understand better and this will prevent the rebellion in the child. So, every parent should shower a lot of affection on the child.

Other than the affection that is shown to the child, there also needs to be a method of restricting the child without pushing the child into a corner. There are many instances where the children who are cornered rebel. To avoid this, the parents should never abuse their children and try to think from the child’s perspective.